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<forumuser name="Blanche Hodapp" />
 
<forumuser name="Blanche Hodapp" />
'''Blanche Hodapp''' (formerly '''Stones''') is a casual member of the [[Sonic scene]], as well as a small fishing village in Berkshire, having visited on and off since sometime in 2001.  
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'''Blanche Hodapp''' (/blæntʃ ˈhɒdæp) (formerly '''Stones''') is a small village in Berkshire, best known for its fishing industry.
  
He's not entirely sure how well-known he is, or whether that matters at all, but if he's known for anything it's probably for having contributed almost nothing to the community since about 2003, except maybe an utterly hilarious ''[[Sonic 2]]'' Alpha hoax which everybody loved and hailed his comedy genius for, no exceptions. This doesn't really bother him though, as he's never really been a part of the hacking and research department, and instead likes to simply hang around and stay in contact with some of the friends he's made over the past eight years.
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It is also a casual member of the [[Sonic scene]], having visited on and off (mostly off) for around ten years <strike>oh God has it been that long</strike>
  
 
==History==
 
==History==
 
===Humble Beginnings===
 
===Humble Beginnings===
Blanche's arrival on the scene can be said to have begun as far back as 1976. The young Blanche, barely two minutes old found <strike>her</strike>himself embarked upon a transAtlantic crossing which was to end horribly when the ship was scuttled by an errant pineapple salesman with a grudge. Only proto-Blanche and <strike>her</strike> his best friend were to survive, conveniently finding themselves washed up on the shores of an uncharted island somewhere in the south Pacific. Or it may've been upon the Dead Sea. Details are sketchy.
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Blanche was discovered in 1976 by a group of tribesman from northern Malawi. Barely two minutes old, with nary a teat to suckle, the tribesman kidnapped <strike>her</strike> him, and transported him back to their home country. Promised with a life of luxury, he agreed but soon found the "luxury" referred to the ratskin coats he was forced into making.
  
The young Blanche and <strike>her</strike> his friend were able to survive for ten whole years, living off coconuts obtained from the tallest palms by throwing balled-up hedgehogs and hoping something came loose. After this, however, disaster struck as Blanche <strike>murdered his friend</strike> was forced to watch as his friend died in unknown circumstances. Apparently she wandered off into the woods and fell asleep and when she woke she was dead. At least, that seemed to keep the authorities quiet.
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During the ten years of his incarceration, the young Blanche found pleasure in performing sinful acts for old sailors who should know better and was sometimes even paid for it. Sometimes money, sometimes stolen goods. His most prized possession from this escapade was a cartridge that a sailor had tried to insert in him. One of the sailors had recently taught him to read (we won't go into that story), and once he wiped off the loose bowel lining, Blanche was delighted to see an inscription... "Sunjc The Hodselog".
  
Where was I? Oh, yes.
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Wait. Let me get my glasses.
  
So Blanche found himself suddenly alone upon this shore, however things were not all bad, for after ten years of coconuts his friend provided the best meal he'd ever tasted in his short, tragic life, and the remains were bashed together to form a rudimentary raft (she was, shall we say, of a rather buoyant figure), by which he left the island and was picked up eighteen hours later by a tramp steamer. He paid his way back home by taking his clothes off for the desperate perverts aboard, but anyone who tried to touch found himself on the receiving end of a whale shark to the bonce.
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''[[Sonic the Hedgehog (16-bit)|Sonic the Hedgehog]]''. That's the one.
  
Once back in sunny Malawi, Blanche rekindled his love of the spiny vermin he'd learned were hedgehogs, not by eating them when they failed to knock coconuts from trees, but instead by playing a game one of the sailors had <strike>inserted in his anus</strike> given him in thanks for a lapdance. This game, he discovered, upon learning to read eighteen years later, had been called ''[[Sonic the Hedgehog (16-bit)|Sonic the Hedgehog]]''.
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So after a few more years of offering lapdances to strangers for sex, drugs, rock, roll and occasionally money, Blanche was finally able to afford one of these internets that were all the rage. Plugging himself in, Blanche was plunged into the wild and wonderful world of [[wikipedia:Usenet|Usenet]], which he found more interesting than real life since arguments were settled by "plonking" and usually revolved around silly things like whether Amy Rose had an erection in [[Sonic_the_Hedgehog_(Archie_comics)|Archie]] issue 81. Fascinating!
  
By this point, the internet had become well-known in most mud-huts, and Blanche found himself thrust into a strange and wonderful world known as [[wikipedia:Usenet|Usenet]]. This proved to be more interesting than real life, there was no medium through which a dispute could be settled with an old-fashioned mud-slinging contest, but instead were settled with "flame-wars" and use of a strange and wonderful device known as "*plonk*". Blanche was fascinated, and found many discussion groups dedicated to subjects he'd never even heard of, like "scat" and "Anne Widdecombe". There was even one for Sonic the Hedgehog!
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Anyway. Desperate for some social contact that didn't end in a sticky mess, Blanche decided to reach out and talk to some of these people, choosing to post under the name Stones. He felt big and clever for the first time in his life, and decided it was time to venture out into the wider jungle of the internet. He found this easy because he was used to jungles - some of those sailors weren't au fait with shaving.
  
Armed with this knowledge, Blanche decided he must once again reach out and communicate with others, and began to post under the name '''Stones'''. This made him feel very big and clever, as he had ripped the name off a Star Trek parody, but who on Earth was to know?! Especially since he only mentioned it twice in his signature, which grew to monstrous proportions, despite the protests of those still crawling on 28.8 dialup connections. Who gave a damn?! If he could read it, so could everybody else!
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It was rather fun exploring the wider internets, and Blanche soon found himself caught up in the weird and wonderful (and utterly illegal) world of emulation. (<strike>"Look, mother! I'm breaking the law and nobody will know!"</strike> This is ''not'' funny. Blanche's mother was killed in a sneak attack in 1849 and he never met the woman.) He also found the [[The Sonic 2 Beta Page|Sonic 2 Beta]] community and plunged right in.
 
 
It was while at this strange and fantastic [[alt.fan.sonic-hedgehog]] group that Blanche, then Stones, began to work his way through the jungle of the internet. A cinch, he thought, as he'd already worked his way through a real one to recover the corpse of his best friend after he'd <strike>thrown her to the mercy of the Vorgons</strike> heard her terrified screams many years before, and rushed to her aid.
 
 
 
Some months later, Blanche began to uncover the utterly illegal world of emulation, focusing primarily on Sonic the Hedgehog, and found a community based around something that had not been mentioned in AFSH for years: The [[The Sonic 2 Beta Page|Sonic 2 Beta]] community. Tightening his <strike>anus</strike> wits, Blanche dove in!
 
  
 
===Sonic 2 Beta & Beyond===
 
===Sonic 2 Beta & Beyond===
 
[[Image:Blanche-hairy.jpg|thumb|right|Over the years, Blanche became known for his excess body hair. As well as what big teeth he had.]]
 
[[Image:Blanche-hairy.jpg|thumb|right|Over the years, Blanche became known for his excess body hair. As well as what big teeth he had.]]
The year was now 1965, and Blanche had been an unofficial member of the Sonic 2 Beta [[wikipedia:ezboard|ezBoard]] for several months, after pretty much forgetting about it after posting once and then deciding he had much better things to do like <strike>picking his nose and flicking it against a wall</strike> studying for his GCSE examinations. Upon his return, Blanche found that he had forgotten his login information for his Stones account, with ezBoard being no help at all as their recovery system would be offline for another three years, and so abandoned this account in favour of another, '''Stones Lavoy'''. Blanche found he had managed to ingratiate himself with certain members of the forums, and used this as his chance to become an elitist and make himself rather unpopular with other members. Despite this, and growing evidence that he would've been better-suited in a therapist's office than let loose upon the internets, Blanche was still able to remain close to those who mattered, while casting a derisive snort upon those he believed didn't.
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Nothing happened.
 
 
Unfortunately, it was during this period that activity at alt.fan.sonic-hedgehog finally dwindled to a halt, as the only discussion would grow to centre around the users of [[wikipedia:WebTV|WebTV]] and the insistence of the userbase of including HTML within their posts, much to the dismay of the hardened veterans, who preferred text-only displays. Blanche therefore came to leave this area of the community for greater things (plus, with forums you could include loads of cool pictures and avatars and things and nobody complained!).
 
  
Over the years, he was present for most major drama, though preferred to watch from the sidelines and shoot off one-line insults when necessary. Except the whole "Demod [[User:Bryn2k|Bryn2k]]" fiasco. He took a more active role there, because he and Bryn bore a childish grudge against one another for some reason. (The author would like to note that Blanche himself admits to only having fleeting memories of events during this period, and those he does remember aren't worth mentioning, thus little humour can be derived from the account.)
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Well, that's not strictly true. Quite a lot happened because it was several years, but nothing important happened.
  
He also saw many attempts, both realised and unrealised, to make something of the community after [[Simon Wai]] reappeared and asked for his forums back, taking a lot of members with him. This includes [[Project Nemesis]], and the hilarity that he seems to recall ensuing during that time. Oh, and the time the forum merged with the "Hot Dim(m)ensions" community. God, that was a funny five minutes until the Scandinavian with the superiority complex ruined it for everyone else. Bastard.
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Okay, so a few things happened. The community was involved in a few very influential internet wars and changed ownership several times. [[Simon Wai]] returned and asked for his site back. Several projects to build a community for the stragglers were started, then dwindled to a halt. [[User:Bryn2k|Bryn2k]] was demodded (don't ask). Then it all kind of fizzled out.
  
Anyway, he remained there right up until the end, noting that over the years the community had stagnated, and from the once-almost-diverse community there now remained about four or five regulars who were liable to frighten off anybody new and sit talking about boobs all day every day which Blanche has no interest in at all.
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As for Blanche, quite a few things happened. He grew in quite a few directions. He escaped from his prison island and found a new home in a place called Creweton. Then he realised he didn't like it very much and went somewhere else. He still took his clothes off for randy perverts because it was the only fun he knew how to do, besides thinking up weird and wonderful ways to off a certain blue sprite. He got married, bore three children and then realised it was a silly idea because those stretch marks will never go away!
  
Eventually, and some might say thankfully, [[Sonic Classic]], as the forum had become known, was finally merged with [[Sonic Retro]], and Blanche went with it (though he'd apparently already registered an account more than a year ago and simply forgotten about it. The reason for this is noted under [[Blanche Hodapp#Contributions|Contributions]]), mainly because it was mid-2008, or thereabouts, and it was better than writing his dissertation.
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And then he rejoined the community under its new title, [[Sonic Retro]]. Well, it was better than doing some real work!
  
 
===The Present===
 
===The Present===
The year is now 2150 and after a grueling eighty-odd years of community life, Blanche is old and tired and more inclined to sit back and tell long, rambling stories to himself because nobody wants to listen. Most major discussions pass him by, because of the prevalence of Yanks on the board who insist upon talking about important things and arguing a lot when he's asleep, so he doesn't get a chance to stick his oar in (and who wants to come in on page 5 of a thread with a rebuttal to a comment made on page 2? Honestly).
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Blanche has been in the community for about ten years and is pretty sick of it to be perfectly blunt. He only hangs around to talk to the people he remembers from times past, and because he and [[ScarredSun]] are lesbros and he can't leave her hanging without a wingman!
 
 
So he sits back, alternating between not posting anything of substance, and making the odd deep and meaningful statement (<strike>often because he has a woody for [[Tweaker]] and doesn't want to leave him disappointed</strike>).
 
  
 
==Contributions==
 
==Contributions==
 
[[Image:Blanche-sparetime.jpg|thumb|right|During his spare time, Blanche enjoys a range of outdoor activities.]]
 
[[Image:Blanche-sparetime.jpg|thumb|right|During his spare time, Blanche enjoys a range of outdoor activities.]]
Comparatively few, considering his many years in the community, but this can be put down to the fact that a lot of people only consider you a useful member if you're involved in a hack or have some manner of disassembly or code that proves that Sonic shot JFK in a [[beta]] version. Blanche never learned to code, [[hack]], splice, [[Disassembly|disassemble]] or deep-fry because he frankly can't be bothered and there are so many people doing it now that anything he'd come across/demonstrate as a wild new hack would be declared older than God Himself, and his estimation would probably drop further in the eyes of those whose penises respond only to the weird and wonderful world of [[hacking]].
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Not many. These days he doesn't have the time or the inclination to learn that ASM business and everyone else seems to have already done everything interesting. And everyone's got an Art 'n' Layout [[Hack]] these days so apparently that just doesn't cut it!
  
Instead, he takes a back-seat, but occasionally pretends to be "creative" by suggesting ideas toward works that are currently in progress. One of his happiest moments was when he suggested, more as a joke than anything else, the name ''[[Sonic 2 LD]]'' for [[Dr. Eggfan]]'s 8-bit ''[[Sonic the Hedgehog 2 (8-bit)|Sonic 2]]'' hack, only to wake up the next <strike>morning</strike> afternoon and find the name had officially been adopted.
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Well, he did contribute to [[Dr. Eggfan]]'s Sonic 2 LD project by suggesting the name. He actually meant it as a joke because of the similarly named Sonic 2 HD project being worked on by other forum members. Nevertheless, he's proud to be of service.
  
He has also expressed an interest in the possibility of a {{LinkRetro|topic=12677|title=Sonic 2D Blast}} hack (though something will have to be done about the name. "Blast", I ask you...), even going as far as contributing art for the [[Rusty Ruin]] stage, however the project has been stricken with a terminal case of disorganisation and lack of real contribution (as well as interest from actual hackers who no doubt have more important things to do, like sitting down), and thus keeps dropping off the radar. Possibly for the best, but time will tell.
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He was also vaguely interested in the {{LinkRetro|topic=12677|title=Sonic 2D Blast}} project, but we all know how that ended.
  
He occasionally flicks through the Wiki, correcting the more glaring errors in spelling and grammar. This keeps him very happy thank you very much.
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Occasionally flicks through the Wiki, if only to be outraged by the very American trends in spelling and grammar.
 
 
It should be noted, however that recently (as of sometime in mid-2009) he has taken an interest in the hacking side, but only because he actually wants the chance to show off his <strike>super-cool</strike> sub-par background and level art. They don't make it easy, though...
 
  
 
==Community Status==
 
==Community Status==
* Oldbie at [[Sonic Retro]] (2006-Present)
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* Oldbie/Queen at [[Sonic Retro]] (2006-Present)
 
* Member/'''Sea Genius''' at [[Sonic Classic]] (2001-2008)
 
* Member/'''Sea Genius''' at [[Sonic Classic]] (2001-2008)
 
* Member at [[alt.fan.sonic-hedgehog]] (2001-2003)
 
* Member at [[alt.fan.sonic-hedgehog]] (2001-2003)
 
==External Links==
 
* [http://bonacleo.deviantart.com Semi-defunct DeviantArt page]
 
* [http://thyqueen.deviantart.com Totally defunct DeviantArt page]
 
* [http://smg.photobucket.com/albums/v315/BHodapp/ Photobucket album] [currently private]
 
* <strike>[http://www.geocities.com/stesn0r/stooalpa/ The remnants of the Sonic 2 Alpha joke]</strike> [Geocities has since closed, but nothing of value was lost]
 
  
 
[[Category:User pages|{{PAGENAME}}]]
 
[[Category:User pages|{{PAGENAME}}]]

Revision as of 20:05, 15 December 2011

<forumuser name="Blanche Hodapp" /> Blanche Hodapp (/blæntʃ ˈhɒdæp) (formerly Stones) is a small village in Berkshire, best known for its fishing industry.

It is also a casual member of the Sonic scene, having visited on and off (mostly off) for around ten years oh God has it been that long

History

Humble Beginnings

Blanche was discovered in 1976 by a group of tribesman from northern Malawi. Barely two minutes old, with nary a teat to suckle, the tribesman kidnapped her him, and transported him back to their home country. Promised with a life of luxury, he agreed but soon found the "luxury" referred to the ratskin coats he was forced into making.

During the ten years of his incarceration, the young Blanche found pleasure in performing sinful acts for old sailors who should know better and was sometimes even paid for it. Sometimes money, sometimes stolen goods. His most prized possession from this escapade was a cartridge that a sailor had tried to insert in him. One of the sailors had recently taught him to read (we won't go into that story), and once he wiped off the loose bowel lining, Blanche was delighted to see an inscription... "Sunjc The Hodselog".

Wait. Let me get my glasses.

Sonic the Hedgehog. That's the one.

So after a few more years of offering lapdances to strangers for sex, drugs, rock, roll and occasionally money, Blanche was finally able to afford one of these internets that were all the rage. Plugging himself in, Blanche was plunged into the wild and wonderful world of Usenet, which he found more interesting than real life since arguments were settled by "plonking" and usually revolved around silly things like whether Amy Rose had an erection in Archie issue 81. Fascinating!

Anyway. Desperate for some social contact that didn't end in a sticky mess, Blanche decided to reach out and talk to some of these people, choosing to post under the name Stones. He felt big and clever for the first time in his life, and decided it was time to venture out into the wider jungle of the internet. He found this easy because he was used to jungles - some of those sailors weren't au fait with shaving.

It was rather fun exploring the wider internets, and Blanche soon found himself caught up in the weird and wonderful (and utterly illegal) world of emulation. ("Look, mother! I'm breaking the law and nobody will know!" This is not funny. Blanche's mother was killed in a sneak attack in 1849 and he never met the woman.) He also found the Sonic 2 Beta community and plunged right in.

Sonic 2 Beta & Beyond

Over the years, Blanche became known for his excess body hair. As well as what big teeth he had.

Nothing happened.

Well, that's not strictly true. Quite a lot happened because it was several years, but nothing important happened.

Okay, so a few things happened. The community was involved in a few very influential internet wars and changed ownership several times. Simon Wai returned and asked for his site back. Several projects to build a community for the stragglers were started, then dwindled to a halt. Bryn2k was demodded (don't ask). Then it all kind of fizzled out.

As for Blanche, quite a few things happened. He grew in quite a few directions. He escaped from his prison island and found a new home in a place called Creweton. Then he realised he didn't like it very much and went somewhere else. He still took his clothes off for randy perverts because it was the only fun he knew how to do, besides thinking up weird and wonderful ways to off a certain blue sprite. He got married, bore three children and then realised it was a silly idea because those stretch marks will never go away!

And then he rejoined the community under its new title, Sonic Retro. Well, it was better than doing some real work!

The Present

Blanche has been in the community for about ten years and is pretty sick of it to be perfectly blunt. He only hangs around to talk to the people he remembers from times past, and because he and ScarredSun are lesbros and he can't leave her hanging without a wingman!

Contributions

During his spare time, Blanche enjoys a range of outdoor activities.

Not many. These days he doesn't have the time or the inclination to learn that ASM business and everyone else seems to have already done everything interesting. And everyone's got an Art 'n' Layout Hack these days so apparently that just doesn't cut it!

Well, he did contribute to Dr. Eggfan's Sonic 2 LD project by suggesting the name. He actually meant it as a joke because of the similarly named Sonic 2 HD project being worked on by other forum members. Nevertheless, he's proud to be of service.

He was also vaguely interested in the
Sonic Retro
Sonic 2D Blast
project, but we all know how that ended.

Occasionally flicks through the Wiki, if only to be outraged by the very American trends in spelling and grammar.

Community Status